Why Is It So Hard to Say No?
You did not want to do it. You said yes anyway.
This video explores why saying no can feel so hard, even when the answer is obvious. It breaks down people pleasing, loss aversion, fear of rejection, social pressure, future simulation, emotional discomfort, and why your brain sometimes chooses an unwanted yes because it stops the bad feeling faster.
The uncomfortable part is that the yes is not always generosity. Sometimes it is self-protection wearing generosity's clothes. You are not protecting the other person from disappointment. You are protecting yourself from imagining their disappointed face.
Squid and Stick explores awkward, funny, uncomfortable human behavior that everyone recognizes but almost nobody says out loud.
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Sources:
Kahneman and Tversky, Prospect Theory: https://doi.org/10.2307/1914185
Eisenberger, Lieberman, and Williams, Does Rejection Hurt?: https://doi.org/10.1126/science.1089134
Gilbert and Wilson, Prospection: https://doi.org/10.1126/science.1144161
Walker, Complex PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving: https://www.pete-walker.com/
YouTube Tags:
why is it so hard to say no, saying no, people pleasing, fear of rejection, loss aversion, social pressure, guilt saying no, boundaries, why do I say yes, emotional discomfort, human behavior, psychology, social anxiety, decision making, awkward moments, Squid and Stick
Pinned Comment:
What is the last thing you said yes to when you meant no?
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