Meghan’s Joyless and Idealess Holiday Special Drops Salmonella Sussex Strikes Again
Meghan Markle’s “With Love, Meghan: Holiday Celebration” just limped onto Netflix and it is the single most joyless, soul-sucking Christmas special ever committed to film. We’re talking a full hour of beige trees, beige ornaments, beige emotions, and a beige personality so muted it makes hospital walls look festive. There is ZERO red, ZERO green, ZERO actual Christmas spirit; just an endless taupe void that sucks the merry right out of your body. This isn’t a holiday special, it’s a hostage video shot inside a West Elm catalog that got mugged by a funeral florist. Meghan claps for herself every 30 seconds, gushes about how “connected and sweet” everything is while visibly recoiling every time Harry tries to touch her, and serves narcissism so thick you’ll need a chainsaw to cut it. The woman cannot stand to be in the same frame as her husband for more than four seconds without looking like she’s calculating alimony. Highlights include: Bare-handing a raw turkey like she’s auditioning for a bacterial biopic (hello, Salmonella Sussex – the nickname that broke the internet)
Stealing Kate’s signature holiday bows and making them look like rejected Spirit Halloween props
Name-dropping Archie and Lilibet 47 times while keeping the actual children locked in the beige witness-protection program
Serving a “festive” table that looks like depression had a baby with a tax audit
Zero fresh ideas, zero warmth, zero reason to exist except to remind everyone why the royals breathed a sigh of relief in 2020. Kate’s serving actual Christmas magic with Kate Winslet and Olivia Colman while Meghan is out here brining poultry in a dog bowl and calling it content. If you’ve ever wondered what happens when ego meets unlimited budget and zero self-awareness, congratulations: you just found it. Watch only if you hate joy.#SalmonellaSussex #BeigeChristmas #MeghansJoylessHoliday #WhereIsTheRedAndGreen #TaupeNightmare #WithLoveMeghan #SussexChristmasFail #KateWonChristmas #NetflixRegret #HolidayHostageVideo
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Netflix Documentary I am reacting to it, recapping it and genuinely bewildered by Harry and Meghan in general. Strap in and enjoy discussing the two biggest victims in their own minds, yikes.
Harry & Meghan is an American documentary series streaming on Netflix, and starring Prince Harry, Duke of Sussex and Meghan, Duchess of Sussex. The series has six parts and covers the couple's relationship from their early courtship to their decision to step back as working members of the British royal family and their subsequent activities. The series also includes interviews with family, friends, historians, and journalists. It is being released in two volumes, on December 8 and December 15, 2022, respectively.
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