There is a difference between sex and intimacy. Once we recognize this and realize why you got married in the first place, it's easy to answer this question and how to overcome feelings of depression.
Our premise is that most marriage problems are caused by a lack of knowledge of the basic principles of marriage or of how to be happy. Once you learn them, it becomes much easier to enjoy living in your marriage.
Here's the reality, sex by itself is just a biologically driven compulsive desire that exists for the species to continue. Procreation is subordinate to the drive to survive.
The human body is an animal body and has all of the instinctive requirements and attributes that we typically find in any animal body. There's defensiveness, reactiveness, and there's that drive to procreate, sex and unfortunately, in our society what's happened is sex has taken the throne in our lives.
It has become the ultimate act, even though we know it can't possibly be because what we really are is souls. Who hasn't heard the term soul mate? Do you think that this was made up by a card company? It's not, you are a soul and you have a body, you also have a mind but you have a body and this body is doing everything it can to take control over you by controlling the mind.
It might be getting a little deep here but think about it this way. As a soul the primary attribute is love, you are essentially a chip off the old block. You are created in God's image, you are love itself as a soul but you come into the body, the body has its desires has its
main drive to survive and it takes over so there's like a struggle between you the soul and your body that's taking place in the mind. Does that make sense to you?
Think about it, you're a soul, you've come into a body, you have a mind and the body which is an animal body wants to control everything. Part of that is by creating the temptation of sex as this hyper enjoyable act and let's face it, it creates pleasure. There's no question about it just like food does but even food is there for survival.
Okay, so let's go to this question of, can a sexless marriage cause depression?
No, because sex is sort of meaningless. But what's really meaningful, what is all important to you as a human being that's important is love; intimacy. You literally got married in order to connect as a soul to another soul.
We do this through the practice the evolving learning of unconditional love, we learn to love. Now what is real is using sex as a bridge for that intimacy connection for that love. So, here's where you have to take a look at your marriage in a different way.
Ask yourself, "Do I have intimacy with my spouse?"
The answer is obviously no, or you wouldn't be watching this video.
So, what's manifesting is that you don't have any sex. I get it but it's not because you
don't desire sex. It's because you haven't learned how to connect as a soul using sex, so sex becomes more of a problem than anything else because the mind is thinking, "Well, am I doing this right? Is she or he doing this right, and what's going on here? How come I'm not having the pleasure and enjoyment?"
And it's because an animal body only can go so far with its desires and then it's exhausted it doesn't want anymore. You eat food just the same way. You may love a meal but you can't eat it continuously.
Now, it's different with love. There is no exhausting love that's what's so beautiful about it.
So here's what you do because this is really what is important.
What you do is you learn to love unconditionally, and that creates the foundation for intimacy utilizing sex.
I promise you this, if you learn to love, if you even begin to learn to love unconditionally, not with restrictions, not with inhibitions and love unconditionally, then I promise you, you will be very very soon.
Happiness is the opposite of depression, right?
Watch the video for more.
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