THE KING'S BREAKFAST. A.A. Milne. Translated by Samuil Marshak. Read by Velvichia Wolf
"The Ballad of the Royal Sandwich"
Author: Alexander
Translated by: Samuil Marshak
The King,
His Majesty,
Requested Her Majesty,
That Her Majesty
Ask the milkmaid:
Could it be possible to bring some butter
For the King's breakfast?
The court milkmaid
Said: "Of course,
I'll go
I'll tell
the cow,
While I'm awake!"
The court milkmaid
Went to her cow
And said to the cow,
Lying on the floor:
"Their Majesties have ordered
A certain quantity
Of the choicest butter
To be brought to their table!"
The lazy cow
Answered sleepily:
"Tell Their Majesties,
That these days many
Two-legged, hornless
Prefer marmalade,
And also pastila!"
The court milkmaid
Said, "Just think about it!"
And immediately to the Queen
She reported:
"I beg your pardon a hundred times
For this suggestion,
But if you spread
On a thin slice of bread
Fruit marmalade,
The King, His Majesty,
Will surely be delighted!"
At once the Queen
Went to His Majesty
And, as if in passing,
She said, out of place:
"Ah yes, my friend, about
The promised butter...
Would you like to try
Marmalade for breakfast?"
The King replied,
"Nonsense!"
The King said,
"Oh, my God!"
The King sighed, "Oh, my God!"
And lay back down in bed.
"No one," he said, "No one in the world
Has ever called me capricious...
I only asked for butter
For breakfast!"
To this the Queen
Said: "Of course!" —
And immediately ordered
The milkmaid to be called.
The court milkmaid
Said: "Of course!" —
And immediately ran
To the cowshed again.
The court cow
Said: "What's the matter?
I didn't mean to say anything bad to you.
Take some curdled milk,
And milk for the porridge,
And some butter,
I can give you some too!"
The court milkmaid
Said: "Thank you!"
And the butter on the tray
She sent to the King.
The King exclaimed: "Butter!
Excellent butter!
Excellent butter!
I love it so much!
Nobody, nobody," he said.
And he climbed out of bed. "Nobody, nobody," he said,
Going downstairs in his dressing gown. "Nobody, nobody," he said,
lathering his hands with soap. "Nobody, nobody," he said,
sliding down the banister. "Nobody will say that I am
a tyrant and a madman,
because I like with my tea
a good sandwich!"