How do you prepare to leave a narcissist? (Ep 44/45)
Matt and Liza were delighted to be joined again by Dr Supriya McKenna, one of the leading experts in the field of narcissism, to discuss how to prepare to leave a narcissist.
Dr Supriya shares her deep knowledge of narcissism, why it is harder to leave one, including hoovering and gaslighting, finding the right lawyer, and practical tips on the preparations needed to end your relationship including finances, online safety, storing previous communications and securing personal and sentimental items.
Matt & Liza share legal insight, the options available to you and the pitfalls to avoid.
00:00 Introductions
02:34 Why is it harder to leave a relationship with a narcissist?
04:44 Why gaslighting will increase post-separation
05:33 Examples of how a narcissist behaviour plays out in divorce
07:50 What is hoovering? And how does the narcissist use this?
13:40 There is a hole in my sidewalk by Portia Nelson
15:08 The prevalence of narcissistic abuse post divorce
19:00 How to prepare to leave a narcissist
19:30 Find the right therapy and therapist
21:10 Don’t tell the narcissist, you know they are a narcissist
24:01 How to find the right lawyer
36:33 The importance of due diligence when selecting your lawyer
37:53 How to financially prepare for a narcissistic divorce
39:10 The paperwork you need to gather
40:50 A legal warning on how to access financial information - Imerman
47:32 How to protect joint assets and bank accounts
52:10 Covering interim costs and bills
54:40 How to protect yourself online and against tech abuse
1:04 Saving previous communications safely for evidence
1:08 Keeping personal and sentimental items safe
1:11 Checking and securing smart home devices
1:13 Dr Supriya’s top tips for preparing to leave a narcissist
If you are in immediate danger of domestic abuse, call the police on 999. You can also access help and support from the 24-hour National Domestic Abuse Helpline on 0808 2000 247 or the Mankind Initiative support helpline: 01823 334 244.
Additional resources
You can catch up on Supriya’s previous podcasts below.
Divorcing or separating from a narcissist: • Stowe talks 5: Divorcing or separating fro...
Parenting alongside a narcissist • Parenting alongside a narcissist
Rebuilding your life after narcissistic abuse: https://bit.ly/422YtMJ
Are you in a relationship with a narcissist? https://t.ly/yEiw2
You buy Dr Supriya’s books on narcissism on Amazon here: https://www.amazon.co.uk/stores/autho...
Understanding and dealing with tech abuse https://bit.ly/3RQ6dzU
How to prepare for your financial settlement • How to prepare for your financial settleme...
Download our free in-depth handbook on how to complete a Form E: https://bit.ly/3A7MMvN
The encrypted email service mentioned in this podcast is Proton Mail: https://proton.me/mail
If you need legal support with the issues raised in this podcast, or would like to speak to a family lawyer, contact Stowe at: https://bit.ly/35WPSj2
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