Link Up With Me (a knot theory rap)
lol
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Lyrics:
(Intro)
One day I'll be
A new PhD
And then you will see
You should link up with me
(Verse 1)
Girl I know that I just met you in this big S^3
But you should come over and handleslide next to me
I've already framed our link diagram D
And I'm 'bout to compute our knot Floer homology
I think I'll take a chance and just roll the dice
But if I had to guess I'd say that you are not slice
It's a conjecture but I've got nothing to prove
I'm just waiting to make my first Reidemeister move
I can't believe that we had never met before
And now we're chillin in the boundary of a big D^4
I think our Seifert surface has genus g
We could have a relationship -- just ask Skein
Let's make a manifold like we're meant to be
And no I'm not referencing the birds and the bees
I'm just talkin 'bout Dehn surgery
So girl do you wanna come link up with me
(Chorus)
One day I'll be
A new PhD
Then you will see
You should link up with me
Open chapter 3
Check the bibliography
There ain't no isotopy
To unlink you with me
(Verse 2)
Hey 'Ye and Jay you better watch the throne
I'm spitting bars thrice as hard and I'm all alone
I'm just tryna get a girl tangled up in my world
So I'm reaching her and teaching her through her headphones
What's our linking number? That's a big unknown
So I wanna win her over on the microphone
Enlist a polynomial I'll pick it for when we get old
And Alexander you can hand her right to Jones
I'm too old for TikTok, too young for post doc
I'm a knotted hot shot mathematical Bach
I never get writers block, gotta keep my rhymes in stock
And all my bars drop hot like a math Tupac
Keep your eyes off the clock when I give a chalk talk
I'm the key to the prop, use me to unlock
The proof of our love, the truth that we sought
Here's my thought: we should tie the knot
You got my heart strings tangled like a (3,2) torus
You make my heart skip a beat just like this beat skipped a chorus
I skip a record like I wanna skip a lecture that bores us
And I'm a lyrical director, I don't need a thesaurus
I'm an embedded S^1 and I'm better in bed
I'm better than your ex was, I'm never left on read
I'm a professor, rap a letter just to get her ahead
Over a bass so heavy that it sinks like lead
With a flow so hot it over-leavens your bread
They said I murdered the beat, I said it's better off dead
They catch me walking down the street with a mathematical cred
I tell you it's no easy feat to be wanted by the feds
For an assassination of instrumental occasion
I'm not a smooth criminal, I'm just a smooth approximation
Lyrically it's only me, no other side of the equation
I got so many levels it's categorification
C.R.E.A.M get the money, replace "cash" with "math"
Spitting so many facts it'll give you whiplash
I can only rap fast, run it like a 100 meter dash
I'm the only rapper living in my isotopy class
Dropping rhymes in a pandemic like an MJ flu game
Call me "Dr. J the Academic", hey that's my new name
In 2022 I'll be a PhD
With a thesis saying girl you should link up with me