Instead - Noah Pacheco (Original)
Instead - Noah Pacheco (Original)
2021: One song per month.
Written, recorded, produced in November 2021.
A song about alternate endings.
Writer's Note:
In my personal life, I'm quite open about my struggles with depression and its related businesses. The struggles have dated back quite a few years now to the point where I others sometimes view me as "an expert in the field." I'm often asked, "how do you do it, Noah? How do you keep going?" The answer varies, of course but in summary: you just do. You keep going. You step forward, take another day, hour or even minute. And eventually you're old enough to be the one answering those questions. This song is my answer to the question "How do you keep going?"
Help a homie out and follow my socials:
Instagram: @noahnotespacheco
Website: noahpacheco.com
Facebook: /noahnotes
Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/artist/6vyso...
LYRICS:
I don't make plans
that are too far ahead for me to see
and I don't make friends
cause friends make it difficult for me to fall asleep.
They ask how I'm feeling. They ask every time.
They ask for a promise after every goodbye.
I tell them don't worry. I tell them I'm fine.
It's just every now and then it's kinda hard to be alive.
And I still get bad. Even after all this time.
And I honestly thought I'd be better by now or just dead.
But here I am instead.
I don't waste time
dwelling on things that I know I can't fix
and I build my walls high
cause safe is the only way I know how to live.
And they ask how I'm feeling. They ask every time.
They ask for a promise after every goodbye.
I tell them don't worry. I tell them I'm fine.
It's just every now and then it's kinda hard to be alive.
And I still get bad. Even after all this time.
And I honestly thought I'd be better by now or just dead.
But here I am instead.
I don't have all the answers.
I've just learned all the tricks of the trade.
Don't mistake my solution
for anything more than first aid.
But just give it more time and maybe you'll find
that yesterday was two years ago.
And it's far from the win we envisioned.
But I call it hope.
And you'll still get bad. Time and time and time again.
And I wish I could say it gets better in time but I know.
That's not always how it goes.
Cause I still get bad. Even after all this time.
And yet somehow we've passed all the deadlines once set in our heads.
Now here we are instead.
Here we are instad.
Instead.
Mm.