2 Things You Can Do When Someone Is Defensive! | 4 Horsemen Of The Apocalypse
Defensiveness can be a really hurtful reaction to something you've said. And it'll often make you feel like the bad person! Defensiveness can take several shapes, like a counter-attack.
In this video I discuss Defensiveness; how to overcome it in your relationships: and most importantly, what we can learn from a defensive reaction (what it means)!
Defensiveness is one of the 4 Horsemen of the Apocalypse (Dr Gottman): Defensiveness, Criticism, Stonewalling and Contempt. These are the 4 styles of Toxic Communication that will damage your relationships and often lead to breakups and hurt.
I am a Counselling Psychologist in my Doctoral training and I make videos on the topics of Relationships, Communication and Sex. While you're here, subscribe, follow me on Facebook, Instagram and see you in another video!
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⏳ Timestamps ⏳
0:00 Four Horsemen: Defensiveness
0:35 How counter-attack can look like
1:05 How a victim-role can look like
1:28 How a justification can look like
1:42 How to take responsibility
2:12 How to share feeling defensive
2:34 What we can learn from a defensive reaction
Disclaimer: Please note that the videos on this channel are for educational purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for professional psychological therapy. Thoughts and opinions expressed in videos are my own.